Gaaaaaaah. I still haven't bought me new laptop. Can't. Decide. What. Thefucktobuy. Still, fingers crossed my brother's sending over his old acer ferrari laptop and htc phone (which I don't need to begin with, the phone I mean) all the way from the bowels of hirsute stinky armpits that is the Middle East. My brother's wife just pumped out a baby boy last April 6. Well then, hello hello, little whimpering sucklehead. Welcome to planet Earth. He's the first Tobias of the next generation of Tobiases and my stupid brother named him Achilles. Whatkindoffuckingnameisthat?? I couldn't stop laughing. The boy being named Achilles, I mean, naming your kid after the most omnipotent mortal in Greek mythology is just, I dunno, just lame. So, what's his nickname? I said over the phone. Chill, he said. What?? Dude. What the fuck? I mean seriously, Chill?

In two hours we'll be chirpily singing hurrah songs in a little van going to Pundaquit, some paradise island in Zambales, with err, with my family.XP They're nice people, my family. While playing a game of Scrabble, my sister says, Keolo you fucking stink. Mommy, Keolo chides her, you said the F word. But you really fucking stink, my sister says. You fucking stink so bad you smell like shit. Mommy, Keolo says. You're saying bad words. My sister glares at him and says, shit fuck shit fuck shit you fucking stink. Moments later, Keolo lifts his foot to his mouth and chews on the scab of his toes. What the fuck are you doing? my sister says. Keolo looks at her, still gnawing on his toes. You are fucking disgusting, she says. Mommy, the F word. But you are fuckfuckfuckfucking disgusting.

I thought it rather sweet, really.

Gaaaaaaah. I need a laptop. The internet is my life.XP I'm a geek and I suck, I know, you don't have to remind me. My social life has become virtually nonexistent.XP

Nothing ever happens in real life. I go to this and that place. I talk to this and that person. I do this and that activity. I read this and that, watch this and that. But nothing really inspiring fires anything inside.XP Nothing thought provoking or the like, just this perpetual state of vacuity and BLAHness. Instances:

• D. H. Lawrence's Lady Chatterley's Lover is BLAH.
• Chuck Palahniuk's Diary is BLAH.
• Mark Danielewski's House of Leaves is BLAH. I adore Johnny though.
• The movie Knowing is BLAH.
• Untraceable reminds me of Shirley Jackson's The Lottery, except that Untraceable has a fucked up stupid shitty ending. Still BLAH, nonetheless.
• Fahrenheit 451 ignited fireworks in my head for one minute then lapsed into an eternity of BLAHness.
• Enchanted Kingdom last Monday was BLAH.
• Today was BLAH.
• And I'm looking forward to spending two BLAH days in Zambales.

What is the meaning of BLAH? Why do I feel BLAH? Why is everybody BLAH? Why is the earth BLAH? Why do I type BLAH? Why do I think BLAH? What is this BLAH experience? Does BLAH even exist? Or does BLAH exist only in the mind? Where did BLAH come from? What is BLAH's purpose? What's the philosophy behind BLAH? Who invented BLAH? What does it mean when I say: I am a BLAH person, who studies in a BLAH school. I read BLAH fiction, watch BLAH films, listen to BLAH music, and I love BLAH food. My fashion style is BLAH. I think the world is BLAH, the universe is BLAH. Everything came from BLAH and will end in BLAH. All those in between is just BLAH. BLAH is the most profound word in the English dictionary. BLAH is the epitome of meaning. To be BLAH, to ask what BLAH is, is to question the very purpose of existence. What is not BLAH, anyway?

I need booze. Ice cold Red Horse beer. Or a bottle of Grand Matador. Everything morphs into a state of unBLAHness when I drink alcohol. It's like this life support system injected into my veins to spring me back from corpse-sciousness.

And. I need to pack my shit and hit the road. I want danggit and red eggs and kamatis for breakfast. And I want a hot mug of Milo.:p Oh boy, numnumnum.

Word did you say?

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